


My love has yellow eyes

by Matrakcsi



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/F, Love, Older Woman, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-04-07
Packaged: 2019-04-19 20:36:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14245248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Matrakcsi/pseuds/Matrakcsi
Summary: Scenes from Minerva McGonagall and Rolanda Hooch's relationship through the years





	My love has yellow eyes

 

**i.**

 

The sun is comfortably warm against her skin, her smooth white skin. When a light breeze comes, it almost feels too perfect lying there outside. The air is filled with the smell of various flowers' scent, and the only sound that can be heard is the singing of the birds and water ruining somewhere far away.

 

The sun is warm, and so is the body next to her, but she doesn't mind. No, not at all. She lazily turns, and now lying on her side, fingers cycling on her lover's chest. She closes her eyes, and everything feels so divine, and she wishes that this moment would never end. She thinks that in this very moment, only at the begging of her life, that she could die happily now. Because she has her, and she is her bright star shining through any darkness that may come.

 

Now the sleeping witch next to her opens her eyes, her hawk-like big yellow eyes. The most spectacular thing Minerva has ever seen. Those eyes can speak louder than words. Catching the hand of the other one, Rolanda borrowing it to her mouth and planting soft kisses on it.

 

"Are you hungry, love?" She asks, her voice is softer than any silk.

 

 _Not for food._ The black haired witch thinks but doesn't want to sound too cheeky, so she simply answers a 'no'.

 

The sky is so beautifully blue, almost impossibly blue.

 

After enjoying the peace, the yellow-eyed one rolls over and gets top on her black haired lover. And without any further ado, she claims her lips with her own in a sweet kiss, again and again.

 

Breaking the kiss Minerva gently pulls a blonde curl behind the other's tiny little ear. She smiles. They both smile.

 

"I love your blonde hair Ro, it's like honey." Now she strokes her cheek. "Do you know that I love you so? Sometimes I think that it's just too much for my heart to take, and eventually, it will break from happiness."

 

Rolanda smiles still but doesn't reply anything. No, she is not good with words, but she loves her Min, very much indeed, and she only hopes that the other witch can feel it.

 

She brushes her nose against Minerva's playfully, then kisses her, this time not so gently, much more passionately. And then her hand is under her silk blouse, the other one is rolling up Minerva's skirt. And then Minerva's screaming her name.

 

Later, back at the McGonagall manor, where they are spending this summer together, she sneaks into Minerva's bedroom, just like she had done the previous nights and she will. She would prefer to share a bedroom with her, but Minerva tells that it wouldn't be alright with her family, but sometimes Rolanda suspects that Minerva's mother knows very well what are they up to, and she feels like she kinda approves.

 

Rolanda spoons against Minerva's slender body and she is about to drift into some sweet sleep, after a perfect day, when Minerva calls her name.

 

"Rolanda?"

 

"Yes?" Ro answers in a sleepy voice.

 

"We'll keep in touch, right?"

 

"Of course we will! Sending owls, and we will spend Christmas together. And when you finish at Hogwarts we'll move into an apartment in London together." She puts a kiss on Minerva's hair. "All right? Would you like that my little kitten?"

 

"Yes, very. . ." She moves even closer to Rolanda's body, they have talked about it for many times, but Minerva needs to hear those words over and over again. They're slowly falling into sleep, and their dreams are filled with each other.

 

But things are rarely going as one predicts, and Rolanda knows it very well.

 

 

 

**ii.**

 

As the new school year starts, Rolanda is back with her Quidditch team, The Holyhead Harpies, and Minerva is back at Hogwarts for her last year there.

 

As the year goes on, the letters are fewer and fewer and eventually they decide not to spend Christmas together. Minerva has too much to study, and Rolanda is occupied with her team.

 

As the term ends Minerva is surprised to hear the Headmaster's offer, that he wants her to stay and teach Transfiguration at Hogwarts. She is not sure if she should take the job, but it's a good opportunity indeed. She sends an owl to Rolanda that night. A week later they meet.

 

As her eyes catch Rolanda's muscular form, she wants to rush to her and held her tightly, to feel her as close as it's possible. But when the yellow-eyed with comes closer she decides to remain in her sitting position. She's changed, she can see that, her blonde hair is cut short, and there are distance and coldness in her moves, which just increases as she starts speaking. She seems so different. Is it her Rolanda still?

 

"So? How what's that urgent matter?"

 

"It's good to see you too Rolanda." She tries to smile, but when the other woman doesn't react in the same way she decides it's best to get straight to the subject.

 

"Well, you know that Professor Leigh is getting older and older and he wants to retire." The blonde witch nods. "And the Headmaster wants to find someone to replace her, and well he asked me." Rolanda still looks straight into her eyes, but there is no sign of surprise in her eyes. "He thinks it would be good for me to learn for a year or two how to work as a Transfiguration teacher, and of course slowly I'll take all of Leigh's classes."

 

"So you don't want to be an Auror then?"

 

Minerva gazes to her hands, not dare to look at her friend.

 

"To tell the truth, I think I've never really wanted to be an Auror, teaching is more suitable for me.Don't you think?"

 

There is a moment of quietness before any of them would start to speak.

 

"You want my permission? Is it that?"

 

"What?" She is taken aback by the coldness of her words "No, I mean as a couple it's something that we should decide together. . ." She places one hand over Rolanda's. "It's not what we have imagined, but we still we would have the weekends, and the holidays to spend together."

 

"Are you sure you want this? I mean our relationship, not the work. The work is fine, you should most definitely accept it. But -- "

 

"No, don't say anything Ro, we'll manage somehow." After a moment of hesitation, she looks into those yellowish eyes and says the words, most precious to Rolanda "I love you, don't forget that."  And Rolanda as she always's done, only nods and hopes Minerva knows that she too loves her, adores her.

 

 

But Rolanda's love is something different from Minerva's. Even though she's never said the three magic words, she may love her deeper. She wants her to be happy, and she knows that there is no one who can be happy with a long distant relationship. Well, she is happy, but who wouldn't be happy with Minerva? She wants her to have a normal life, a partner who suits her and her life, not her. No, Minerva deserves better. So she slowly gets distant from her, getting her free, free from the chains that might attach Minerva to her.

 

So one day, after weeks of silence she writes to Min. It's hard but it has to be done, for the sake of Minerva.

 

The letter is short, she informs her about an affair she had with a witch, and that she can't keep going on with this, and they would better be apart.

 

Lying to her beloved Min has always been a cruel thing, but it's for the greater good. Or she thinks so. She must belive in it.

 

When Minerva reads the letter, silent tears start running down her cheeks. When she hears a knock on the door and opens it, she is grateful that it's Albus Dumbledore. She weeps as a child and Albus stays with her the night, speaking and comforting her.

 

That's the night when her friendship with Albus  has started. Much later she thinks it's something she should be grateful for Rolanda.

 

 

**iii.**

 

As an attractive, young and clever woman Minerva McGonagall she is beloved in her new workplace and even though she doesn't want to think about it, it's obvious that she could easily find a new partner.

 

Time goes on, and wounds start to heal but will remain in the heart.

 

Her friendship with Dumbledore is something she considers the best thing that period of her life. And the teaching is also causing her so much joy. She is an easy learner, and after a year she is ready to be the Transfiguration mistress of Hogwarts.

 

Later she becomes the Head of Gryffindor, an exciting new thing to do, and she loves every aspect of it. The castle soonly becomes her home, and she thinks she is happy as things are. Only that she isn't. There is something missing, and as a passionate Gryffindor, it's something she can't just forget. It's romance and love. Two things that were the synonyms of Rolanda Hooch for years, and now it's time to change that.

She can try, she will try,

 

When  one of the summer holidays she goes home and finds a handsome visitor at her parents' home, she is happy to hear that he is single.

 

Soon he asks her to marry him, and she just can't say no. She wants to love him so much, but she doesn't. And after their wedding when he takes her, when she reaches her release, she closes eyes and a blonde woman's face comes to her mind, and she has to bite her lips to not to scream Rolanda's name. And when they have finished, Minerva turns from her husband and feels guilty.

It's the moment when she realizes that she belongs to Ro, no matter what, because she doesn't feel guilty about thinking of an other while having sex with her husband, but because having sex with someone other than Rolanda.

 

Rolanda is there at Minerva's wedding only Min doesn't know about it. Rolanda's got a letter from Minerva's mother, whom she loved as her own (hers died when she was born) telling her about Minerva's wedding.

 

She doesn't go in, only listens from outside, hoping that it's just a nightmare and Minerva will say laughing that no she would never marry that man and then she will come out and leave with her. . .

 

But no, it will never happen because firstly Minerva doesn't know that she is there, and secondly, she thinks her a jackass.

 

After the ceremony, before everyone would come out, she leaves with her broom, hot angry tears filling her eyes. And then she does something she has never done before, getting unfaithful to Minerva. With a wicth she barely even knows, and then she feels terribly awful.

 

 

**iv.**

 

Years later, she, Rolanda, enters the gates of Hogwarts again. It seems a lifetime ago when she was last there. As students. With  _her_.

 

She knows nothing about Minerva now, once she has seen her at Minerva's father's funeral. Minerva's mother sent her an owl to come if she would like to, and when she arrived and Minerva's mom gave her a hug, she saw Minerva near to them, with a stern looking man. She looked like the same, the same fine black hair, white skin and green eyes. Still gorgeous, but somehow very distant. And Ro felt embarrassed because she knew she looked so messy, and boyish.

 

Now as she is going up to the Headmaster's office, she is thinking about whether Minerva is still working here or not. As a married woman she must live with her husband, not in the school, and surely they must have many children by now. Many little Minervas. It must be an adorable sight.

 

Her heart skips a beat as she thinks of that maybe she is there,and they could meet accidentally.

 

Albus Dumbledore, still the sweet man he always has been, informed her about the aspects of her position as a flying teacher. And when Quidditch comes up, she is happy to speak about her passion.

 

They agree on that she should come into the castle only when the school year will start. She will stay at her London apartment until then.

 

As she leaves the school she comes across a rather shadowy corridor, and a rather old memory cames into her mind of her and a young Minerva, snogging there between classes. She wonders if the students still uses this place for the same reason.

 

When she enters the Great Hall for the feast, she is partly happy and partly sad for not seeing Minerva there. But then she comes in, with the first years, and the sorting starts, and Rolanda can't take her eyes off of her.

 

The feast is rather good and she even gets to speak with a witch called Poppy, the new matron, she says to be. And it seems like it would be easier than she believed to make friends here.

 

 

 

**v.**

 

Weeks have passed since the start of the new term, and still she hasn't got to speak with Minerva in private, and it's starting to be awkward. They need to settle things down, they are now colleagues and need to have a professional relationship. And she needs to speak with her.

 

Then one afternoon she decides to take the step, and even though she repeats that she must not look at her the way she does, she takes more time to chose her robes and she tries to make her blonde hair to look lovely or something. But no, she declines to acknowledge that she is still in love with her. Maybe she fancies her, but who wouldn't?

 

She knocks on the door, and then a voice came shouting "enter" so she does as been told. As she steps in she founds a rather tired looking Minerva sitting on the floor with a baby.

 

But before she can say anything, the little one looks at her and she thinks she's gone mad. The baby has _her_ eyes, the big hawk-like yellowish eyes. She doesn't know what to say so she says the first thing coming to her mind.

 

"If I didn't know, I would say it's my children."

 

"Well, I can assure you that he is my little son."

 

"Sorry I didn't mean. . ."

 

"It's all right, my mother said the same though, the he has your eyes. And I can't deny the fact."

 

Rolanda then walks towards them and sits down next to Minerva.

 

"But he has your hair, the fine raven black hair." She has to hold back her impulse to touch the other witch's hair, and caress it.

 

"Yes, indeed."

 

After minutes of silence, the blonde decides it's time to leave.

 

"Well sorry for interrupting and err. . . Give my best to your husband."

 

"I have no husband," the other says still paying her attention to her son "he died not so long ago. Aurors's fate,  I guess." She says those sorrowful words without sorrow and Rolanda wonders why is that.

 

"I'm sorry Min."

 

"It's alright. I'm getting over it now. And I have my little one." after a moment of hesitance, she adds "And it was lovely to see you. Please come by again if you have time." Only now does she look up, and lock eyes with Rolanda. Then Rolanda leaves, more confused than ever.

 

For weeks, months they go on like that, spending time together like nothing ever happened between them. They even laugh together but never talk about the past.

 

One afternoon when Rolanda is paying her usual visit to Minerva and little Eric, she finds the black haired witch alone.

 

"Where is Eric?" she asks.

 

"Poppy and Dumbledore are taking care of him. They are his godparents, I don't know if I've ever mentioned that fact." Somewhy Rolanda feels bitterness. She hates that he has no bounds to the child, but she doesn't know why is that.

 

"Uhm, maybe I should leave then. Surely you're happy to have a quiet evening alone." But when she is about to leave, she feels a hand on her elbow. "Don't go," Minerva whispers "don't go this time."

 

Rolanda feels a sudden dizziness in her head and wants to say something, to make their relationship as it was before, but what is there to say, after all those years?

 

"I'm sorry." She says the words, only these words, even though there is an ocean of words in her head that she would like to share. She stands there, feeling so dumb for coming here, saying those words. Minerva seems so deep in her thoughts that she isn't even sure she has heard her.

 

"What for?" _Really, what for?_ Rolanda asks herself. For growing cold towards her, lying to her, or for not keeping in touch? Or for not saying those three words, 'I love you'?

 

Then words start to spill out from Rolanda's mouth. Words of pain and regret and words of love. They are sitting on the couch, with warm teas and with each passing hours they are growing closer. Around midnight Minerva stands up, making Rolanda think she wants to retire. And it's partly true because she is going in the way to her bedroom, but she brings a rather blushing Rolanda with her. And what happens in the bedroom is nobody's business but theirs.

 

Waking next to Minerva in the morning, her Min, is something she missed terribly. And now she is enjoying it and trying to memorize every aspect of it. The softness of the sheets, and the rising of Minerva's chest, the soft sounds she makes in her sleep, and how her black curls spill on the cream colored pillow. And the way she smiles as she opens her eyes and looks into her lover's yellow eyes. And how she teases her. Well, they still have time before she should bring back Eric, so why not make good use of it?

 

 

 

**vi.**

 

They hardly can keep their hands off of each other after that they're reunited. They are snogging at breaks like lovefool teenagers, and soonly Rolanda's rooms lying abandoned, and they decide it would be wiser to live together in Minerva's rooms. Dumbledore approves.

 

And with this not just their relationship changes, but also Rolanda's relationship with little Eric.

 

The boy is growing fast, and at 3 he is fond of her 'momma Ro' as he calls Rolanda. Minerva loves looking at them, and it seems so natural, like Eric was her son too. And he is, in a way.

 

At the age of 7, he is learning how to ride a broom. He is very good at it, making Rolanda so proud, that her eyes became watery. Minerva places a hand on her waist and whispers in her earl."Our son is so talented, I can't wait to see in which house he will be sorted in." Rolanda only nods, she again can't find the right words to say.

 

When Eric becomes 11, and Minerva places the sorting hat on his head, Rolanda takes back her breath. They have been waiting for this day so very much, and finally it's here.

 

"Hufflepuff" The old hat nearly shouts the words.

 

Minerva glanced at her only for a moment. This is a big moment for them, their boy is sorted, and from now on he will be live in the Hufflepuff dormitory away from them. Damn, he is growing so fast. . .

 

After Eric's first flying lesson, the boys ask how can he fly so good, and his answer is filled with proudness.

 

"My momma taught me so, you know, she played at The Holyhead Harpies."

 

 

 

**vii.**

 

When Rolanda's father dies and she disappears for two weeks,  Minerva doesn't ask anything. And when Rolanda comes back and takes her roughly against the wall, she doesn't ask anything either.  She is willing to give anything she can. She is willing to support her, no matter what.

 

When Albus dies Minerva weeps like a child, the way she did when Rolanda had broken up with her. And this time Rolanda is there for her. She talks to her, embraces her, and does everything a woman can to help the love of the life.

 

But they also have happy moments. Sometimes. Most of the source of their joy is Eric, and of course each other.

 

For instance, when Eric is getting married and they share a little dance, and Minerva puts her head on her shoulder, she closes her eyes and imagines what would it feel to be in their own wedding. She knows that it's not something likely to happen, but it feels so good to imagine Minerva as her bride.

 

 

 

**viii.**

 

The war is over. Again. It's over. And Potter lives. Eric lives. They live. And these are the only thing matter. And they can rebuild the wizarding world, and Hogwarts of course.

 

She opens her eyes and snuggles closer to the other body in the bed. It's still dark, but the moonlight is showing through the window and it looks so marvelous on Minerva.

 

Her hair is now streaked with silver, but it only makes her more majestic if it's possible. Her skin is now marked by the years, and there are some deeper lines next to her mouth, but she loves it. As the years go on she only falls for Minerva more and more, and now she is not afraid anymore to tell her she loves her. Not after everything they have gone through.

 

She knows that she has become old too, it's enough to think of her fully grey hair, and the fact that she has become soft in places she used to be muscular. But she doesn't mind, because she was able to grow old with Minerva, her beloved one.

 

But it isn't the only thing that has changed. She sits up, looking around the room. Even after a year, it's still so unfamiliar. It takes long to get used to it. The Headmistress's room, and now the Headmistress and also her room. At first Minerva refused to move in here, but after she comes to the conclusion that she must do it.

 

So now here they are, lying in Albus's old bed. Old lovers in an old bed. How poetic. She snores. Minerva moves on the bed. She still doesn't sleep well, and she feels guilty for waking her up.

She feels a familiar hand petting her back.

 

"Love, are you all right?"

 

"Yes, it's just. . . You know. . ."

 

Minutes go by, and Rolanda thinks that Minerva has gone back to sleep, but she is wrong.

 

"Yes," Minerva's voice is a mere whisper "but it's over now. And a new era is coming my dear, and you and I will make it better."

 

She leans back. Minerva rolls over and looks down at her.

Rolanda's eyes look like gold in the moonlight. She reaches up to Minerva's face and caresses her just like she had done the first time many years, decades ago.

 

"I love you, Minerva McGonagall." She confesses.

 

When the morning comes, the two women are lying in each other's arms nakedly and happily.

 

 

 

 


End file.
